As a coach, I get to help people transform their lives. I get such joy from seeing the physical and emotional transformation that takes place when my clients create the lifestyle and life they have imagined for themselves. While I wish I could spread this feeling to everyone, the reality is that not everyone is ready for change. At least not in this present moment, and the present moment is all that matters.
I often meet individuals that inquire about my services or are curious about life coaching and seem genuinely interested working with me, and then they don’t call me back for months. Are they afraid of change? Perhaps. Are they procrastinating? Maybe. Are they ready to make a change? Probably not.
Here’s the thing. Fear will always exist. So will the list of reasons why this is not the best time in your life to do the thing you want to do. Until you are ready, you’re not ready. It’s as simple as that. Whether it’s changing your diet or starting an exercise routine, changing jobs or careers, moving to another country, or leaving the comfort and security of a familiar relationship; there is always going to be an aspect of fear and discomfort associated with making any type of significant change in your life.
The point in time at which you finally take action, is the moment where the pain and discomfort of staying where you are is greater than the pain and fear of moving forward.
Often we think that someone who has done something we can’t imagine doing ourselves has more courage than we do. That somehow they must not have experienced the same fears, doubts and obstacles that we are experiencing. This is an illusion and couldn’t be further from the truth.
The old adage really applies here: Courage is not the absence of fear, but the ability to act in spite of it.
Whatever situation you find yourself in right now. If you’ve been putting off taking the next step, whatever that may be for you, don’t be too hard on yourself. Understand that for whatever reason, you were not or are not ready yet. But also remember this, the process of change always starts on the inside before you can begin to take visible steps on the outside. Be patient with yourself and also know that you don’t need to take drastic steps immediately, simply begin to do the work on yourself and the transformation will happen.
If you find yourself at a point where you’re not sure if you should take the next step, here are some things to ask yourself:
- Does the thought of your situation not changing feel almost unbearable?
- Does the thought of things staying exactly the same scare you more than the though of the unknown?
- Do you often find yourself frustrated by your present circumstances?
- Have you been feeling particularly sad, unhappy, tired, or unmotivated for an extended period of time?
- Do you look forward to the end of the week and dread the beginning of a new one?
- Whatever roadblock to change may be in your mind, if that didn’t exist, would you do it?
Remember that you don’t have to do it alone. There are resources and support all around you, including friends, family, coaches, counselors, books, conferences, support groups, mastermind groups and even online groups. The people and resources that can help you will change as you move through the process, just start somewhere and the rest of your path will unfold.
To your health and happiness,